Motherly Day 2020

Marge & Nana

Mid-pandemic, as we quietly approach the annual celebration dedicated to mothers, I have some thoughts about this day.

If I could, I would change Mother’s Day to Motherly Day. I wrote about this before, and I am struck that I feel the same way now that I did three years ago.

There are so many elements connected with Mother’s Day that are lovely.

A forced pause of appreciation.

A reason for family members to gather.

I am grateful to have my mother whom I lovingly call Marge live a half mile away from me. It’s reassuring to know she is just down the street should I need anything…advice, vanilla, toilet paper and paper towels. I am also grateful to be a mother and to have the joy of raising children and being able to watch them grow up and evolve into adults.

As much as I enjoy Mother’s Day, I am equally pained by it. My thoughts wander to how this day feels for those who have lost their mother, or a child, or had miscarriages, or were unable to have a child. Next, to the child who was abandoned by his or her mother. Or abused by her. Or disappointed or embarrassed by her. The heartache is palpable and makes me want to reduce the noise and attention we are used to giving to this day.

I also struggle with the fact that I would trade one special day of the year for 365 days filled with tiny moments of meaningful acts of love and appreciation. How we consistently show up for each other is so much more powerful than doing the annual scramble solely for the purpose of being able to say you did something.

In light of all of this, I would like to dedicate this post to all of the motherly people in my life:

Marge, I love you always. You have taught me to lighten up, to laugh until I start to cackle, to be generous, to be honest, to stay connected.

To my sister-in-laws: I am truly grateful for you. Thank you for inspiring me and for showing me what sisterhood is all about.

To my girlfriends: Life would be empty without you.

To my favorite guys otherwise known as my ‘ladies’: A more motherly group could not possibly exist without y’all.

Finally…

Jacob, Sam & Emmy: You are in my heart always. You are everything to me.

For everyone who has ever done something selfless for another person or animal, Happy Motherly Day. Today, tomorrow and everyday thereafter is your day.

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